Flying with Fred - Volume III, No 5
So much for
Global Warming…Here it is late January, and things are
back to normal- even Florida is experiencing temps in
the mid-30’s, and forget about buying orange or
grapefruit juice if their crop goes to heck, like it
did in California. Although logic may dictate that,
with all our gassy emissions (man made, and man
“originated”… as in biologically) we are really
polluting things up, I still want to know why in
1850-something the temperature on this date in January
was 70 degrees, as you periodically see on the weather
forecasts, with NONE of the current gas, etc. around
back then (except, of course, for the biological
stuff…).
I would like to report I’ve made some headway with my New Year’s Resolution to get more stuff built, fixed, etc., but thanks to Microsoft, so far it’s been a bust. I have a certain amount of disdain for computers, in that I see them as I see a hammer, lawn mower, or electric drill- that is, as a TOOL. I expect my tools to work, regularly, with an absolute minimum of maintenance, absorb a fair amount of punishment while being used, and be extremely easy to fix should they break. Or, at least be cheap to replace if they do break.
No such luck with computers. Not only have I have been spending increasing amounts of time in front of the Mesmerizing Monitor since I first broke down and had to purchase one of them (OK, the Flight Simulator is cool, but that’s it…) but thanks to Microsoft trying to FIX something that WASN’T broken, the last 3-plus weeks have found yours truly immersed in an electronic conundrum which continues to expand exponentially. For the record, if you have Windows XP, do NOT download Service Pack #2, unless you want funny things to happen to your machine- including your CD-RW capability going South on you, and Word taking up to 2 or minutes to open or load a document, amongst other evils.
Thanks to a flurry of correspondence with one Anne in Microsoft Support in California (doggedly helpful, as well she should be for the $35 charged) I have arrived at the 8th “suggested remedy”- the one I feared would eventually be required- reinstalling Windows XP. Now I will spend more time backing up files, and hope that the important stuff doesn’t disappear into the ether. If you see a small mushroom-shaped cloud around Rye in the next few days, you’ll know that I’ve been either unsuccessful, OR successful, once the smoke clears. I think it’s a conspiracy to get me to upgrade to VISTA…
I’ve made up my mind to spend more money I don’t have, and pick up the new Hangar 9 Sopwith Camel, and the associated electric conversion hardware. If it’s around at the WRAM show, I’m bringing one home. It will do double duty at Rhinebeck and the NEAT Fair in September. Speaking about the WRAM show, we need responsible members to volunteer for our booth. Of importance is a reliable someone to keep track of membership renewals, and give out stickers as warranted. Not that it’s (ahem) happened in the past, but if Joe Jet or Andy Airplane (former members) now decide to come back, and innocently hand over $50, I need someone to diplomatically, but FIRMLY, tell them that we’re going to need an additional $30… that kind of thing.
I’m going to devote the rest of this month to the following item from the current Air & Space magazine issue, from an article about airplane salesmen. It’s a keeper…
I would like to report I’ve made some headway with my New Year’s Resolution to get more stuff built, fixed, etc., but thanks to Microsoft, so far it’s been a bust. I have a certain amount of disdain for computers, in that I see them as I see a hammer, lawn mower, or electric drill- that is, as a TOOL. I expect my tools to work, regularly, with an absolute minimum of maintenance, absorb a fair amount of punishment while being used, and be extremely easy to fix should they break. Or, at least be cheap to replace if they do break.
No such luck with computers. Not only have I have been spending increasing amounts of time in front of the Mesmerizing Monitor since I first broke down and had to purchase one of them (OK, the Flight Simulator is cool, but that’s it…) but thanks to Microsoft trying to FIX something that WASN’T broken, the last 3-plus weeks have found yours truly immersed in an electronic conundrum which continues to expand exponentially. For the record, if you have Windows XP, do NOT download Service Pack #2, unless you want funny things to happen to your machine- including your CD-RW capability going South on you, and Word taking up to 2 or minutes to open or load a document, amongst other evils.
Thanks to a flurry of correspondence with one Anne in Microsoft Support in California (doggedly helpful, as well she should be for the $35 charged) I have arrived at the 8th “suggested remedy”- the one I feared would eventually be required- reinstalling Windows XP. Now I will spend more time backing up files, and hope that the important stuff doesn’t disappear into the ether. If you see a small mushroom-shaped cloud around Rye in the next few days, you’ll know that I’ve been either unsuccessful, OR successful, once the smoke clears. I think it’s a conspiracy to get me to upgrade to VISTA…
I’ve made up my mind to spend more money I don’t have, and pick up the new Hangar 9 Sopwith Camel, and the associated electric conversion hardware. If it’s around at the WRAM show, I’m bringing one home. It will do double duty at Rhinebeck and the NEAT Fair in September. Speaking about the WRAM show, we need responsible members to volunteer for our booth. Of importance is a reliable someone to keep track of membership renewals, and give out stickers as warranted. Not that it’s (ahem) happened in the past, but if Joe Jet or Andy Airplane (former members) now decide to come back, and innocently hand over $50, I need someone to diplomatically, but FIRMLY, tell them that we’re going to need an additional $30… that kind of thing.
I’m going to devote the rest of this month to the following item from the current Air & Space magazine issue, from an article about airplane salesmen. It’s a keeper…
Like those
who sell almost any luxury item, airplane salesmen
encounter prospective customers who often dream beyond
their means... Independent salesman Fred Ahles was
trying to size up a customer during a telephone inquiry
he received about 10 years ago. An older sounding
gentleman wanted a new, single engine Piper Saratoga...
the man on the phone was 200 miles away, and promised
if Ahles could deliver the new Saratoga that same day
he'd buy it. The brashness made Ahles suspicious, and
he feared he'd blow an entire afternoon and lots of
fuel showing an airplane to a wannabe. Ahles began
questioning the man:
Have you ever owned an airplane before, sir?
"Sonny, I've owned about 35 of them".
Really? How long have you been flying?
"Since the 1930's..."
Do you have an airplane now?
"I sold it".
Really? What kind of airplane was it?
"A 747".
Why did you sell it?
"The neighbors complained, said it was making too much damned noise. I kept it in my back yard".
Why did you have the 747?
"The 707 wasn't big enough for the elephants".
About this time Ahles decided that perhaps the gentleman was not only unqualified to buy an airplane, but also insane. As the conversation continued, the man explained that his wife used to train exotic animals, and that he also used to own a Piper Cheyenne 400 Turbo. Ahles remained skeptical, but promised that he would call the man right back. He called Piper to see if they knew anything about him.
"Fred- he's LOADED," a Piper manager said. "Get your butt up there".
So Ahles flew the Saratoga from Fort Lauderdale to the man's private, 7,500-foot runway in Ocala, where he was greeted and invited to lunch at the prospect's house, a 1920's mansion once owned by the Vanderbilts. To get there, the two men walked through a tunnel in the 30-foot high blast wall constructed at the end of the runway for the 747…The man ended up buying the Saratoga. Today, the land around what was his private airstrip has been converted to an exclusive, fly-in community called JumboLair...John Travolta lives there, along with his Boeing 707.
Until next time, fly safely, but FLY!
Have you ever owned an airplane before, sir?
"Sonny, I've owned about 35 of them".
Really? How long have you been flying?
"Since the 1930's..."
Do you have an airplane now?
"I sold it".
Really? What kind of airplane was it?
"A 747".
Why did you sell it?
"The neighbors complained, said it was making too much damned noise. I kept it in my back yard".
Why did you have the 747?
"The 707 wasn't big enough for the elephants".
About this time Ahles decided that perhaps the gentleman was not only unqualified to buy an airplane, but also insane. As the conversation continued, the man explained that his wife used to train exotic animals, and that he also used to own a Piper Cheyenne 400 Turbo. Ahles remained skeptical, but promised that he would call the man right back. He called Piper to see if they knew anything about him.
"Fred- he's LOADED," a Piper manager said. "Get your butt up there".
So Ahles flew the Saratoga from Fort Lauderdale to the man's private, 7,500-foot runway in Ocala, where he was greeted and invited to lunch at the prospect's house, a 1920's mansion once owned by the Vanderbilts. To get there, the two men walked through a tunnel in the 30-foot high blast wall constructed at the end of the runway for the 747…The man ended up buying the Saratoga. Today, the land around what was his private airstrip has been converted to an exclusive, fly-in community called JumboLair...John Travolta lives there, along with his Boeing 707.
Until next time, fly safely, but FLY!